Divorces can be messy. This chapter will assist you in understanding how to ‘sort out your finances during a divorce procedure. Please note, this chapter is for both divorce proceedings and/or proceedings to end a civil partnership.
There are five major things here that need to be sorted out. They are:
- If you have children, who are they going to live with and where.
- How will each of you support your children.
- Where each part lives.
- How much will you live on.
- How will you share out any savings or pensions and divide responsibility for any debts?
This can be a very hard decision to make and often it can be emotional and testing times. However, for any couples with children, a good place to start would be to ask, ‘what is best for my child?’. Other things that should be considered are, incomes, debts, age of children, period of marriage, how old each of you are, are you both in paid work (and if not, how easy will it be to find work?), health issues, and the cost of purchasing a home in your current area.
Despite this being a hard decision, choosing to negotiate and decide how to sort out your finances together is better than going to court as court settings can be stressful and expensive. IF, HOWEVER, your ex has been abusive to you in the past or is still being abusive think very carefully about whether or not it is safe for you to deal directly with them about your finances or any other issues for that matter. If you are on a low income and can get evidence of the abusive nature of your relationship you may be able to get legal aid to cover the costs of a solicitor.
If deciding together is not a viable option, you can choose to use a family mediator. A family mediator is trained to aid in discussions and can help you put your feelings aside and focus on the issues that need to be sorted out. A family mediator is usually used because it can offer a safe, neutral environment in which you and your ex could find to be easier to discuss issues. It can also be less stressful for you and any children, quicker, cheaper, and assist you in reaching a fair and agreeable agreement. If you cannot bring yourself to meet your ex or negotiate in person. You can get a solicitor to negotiate for you – this of course will be much more expensive in comparison.
After you have an agreement, you must then apply to the court for a consent order. A consent order will put any agreement you reached to make it legally binding and to allow you to enforce all that has been agreed upon. You do not need a solicitor to assist you in getting a consent order, you can do this on your own. However, a judge may ask for a court hearing to ensure that parties understand what they are agreeing to. If, however, your ex has hired a solicitor to draft a consent order, you should double-check it as it can be full of legal terms, making it hard to understand. Check everything as what was agreed upon initially may not have fully transferred to the consent order. You can either get a solicitor to look at it or visit a pro bono centre to ask for guidance.
Judges may interfere when it comes to asset distributions. Assets are everything you have other than income – things worth money, like houses and other property, furniture, cars, investments, savings, pensions, and jewellery. (Note, however, that if you have a prenuptial agreement before your marriage, assets in there are yours and yours alone.)
Assets that will generally be the most important will be considered first by a judge. If you have children, their welfare is of prime importance. Therefore, assets will mainly go into providing a suitable home for your child. Whoever currently owns the home, is generally of no significance as property can be transferred if need be. A family home that is rented may also be an asset. If you have a local authority or housing association landlord then a judge has the power to transfer the tenancy to one of you. If you have a private landlord, the judge doesn’t have the same power but will still need to know how you intend to deal with the tenancy.
If you need housing benefit you can get an estimate of what you will be given by checking the Housing Benefit Gov website. If either of you or your children has a physical or mental disability or ill-health, then this may impact your housing need. For example, if the family home has already been adapted to meet the needs of a disabled family member, then, if it’s financially possible, it may make sense for whichever one of you is disabled or cares for the disabled family member to keep the home. This will be considered when deciding about the assets. Even if a judge does not step in, when discussing between you and your ex, this should all be considered.
3.22